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on leaving the church

I enjoy reading other people’s blogs when I get the opportunity. It’s times like now, when Cole is all snuggled up in bed for a nap that I can get online and lose myself in other people’s lives. Sometimes though I think I really do lose myself in their writing. I wish I could be that witty, that funny, that fascinating, that mysterious, that blessed, that close to God.

We are our own best critic, or worst critic. I have learned one thing about reading blogs and that’s that I definitely do not have the relationship with Him that I’d like. So because of that, I have been “church shopping”. I realize how ridiculous that sounds but it is what it is.

I was raised Catholic and Will and I married in the Catholic church. Cole was baptized in the Catholic church as well. Will was not raised Catholic, he was Christian but he has been patient and accepting of his new religion. He has probably been more patient and accepting than I have. My mom is a devout Catholic and to her complete dismay, I have considered leaving the Catholic church. She doesn’t understand it. My thing is though that I know nothing about our God or our Bible and in order to be closer to Him I have to know Him. I thought that maybe I just hadn’t found the church that I feel I belong to but through my shopping. I still don’t know. But I have found some churches that I really really liked.

What is it about those curches? Well, for starters, there are classes for little ones as little as Cole. They had nurseries where I can leave Cole and actually listen to the word of God. We read straight from the Bible. I was so amazed in one church that everyone that wanted had an opportunity to have a prayer request and there was a closing prayer at the end. It was less formal and traditional than I am accustomed to with Catholic services. They also have Women’s bible study and retreats that Will and I can be a part of together as a couple, or alone, as individuals. My mother insists that this is the case at some Catholic churches but I have yet to find one like that. For now though my mother can be at peace knowing that I haven’t left the religion but I’m still still on the hunt for the church that will teach me about this wonderful and powerful man.

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